Inside the confessional mind of Emperor Qin Shi Huang/ Ying Zheng

It is 12 O clock mid-night. The emperor Ying Zheng is still awake. Sadak-Chhap pays a visit to his old friend, wants to know the reason of his restlessness.

Below is the transcript of their conversation…

SC: What is keeping you awake in the middle of the night when the country sleeps in peace?

Ying Zheng : I have been accused… Accused of being biased.

SC: Emperor Qin is accused? By whom? Since when the emperor started giving heed to accusations?

YZ: I am getting tiered of living a life without any options sadak chhap.

SC: I thought you liked your life without confusions.

YZ: you have been away very long. Things have changed probably more so inside me. Now I feel confusion is a liberty that I don’t have any more. I am sinking under my own weight. Enslaved by my own image.

SC: But then you asked for it.

YZ: Why are you here for? To add to my wounds

SC: Sorry, but don’t you know I dwell on people’s guilt. I thought I will never get you. You never ever had any guilt.

YZ: I thought this world is filled with incompetent creature, if left alone they will start digging their own grave. All they can do is dream of beauty, which they understand, which falls into their miniature definitions from microscopic point of views. And then they wrap it with ugly polythene bags and ask for an honest opinion. As if I care what is under the plastic wrapper. As if they care about the truth.

SC: So what do you want to say? You know the truth?

YZ: You disappoint me Sadak Chhap. You know me for very long time, do you think I would ever care for the truth. You give me a spark and I can make sun out of it. Give me a drop of your tear and I can dry up the whole ocean to replace it. The truth as you perceive is inconsequential.

SC: And the truth that you perceive?

YZ: Please are you kidding me, do you really think truth can be interpreted. Can be defined and be expressed. Even if it was possible I won’t have bothered myself with it. I do things, I run things around here. I am the truth. Now these creatures expect me to form an opinion over the plastic wrapped dreams. I am sorry to say ‘It’s all good’. Pass it on to me. But no no no they want an opinion properly spiced up with ignorance and human feelings.

SC: Why do you bother? Sun raises everyday and if you ask me it is a miracle. But it will still rise if you don’t even notice it. Why do you bother?

YZ: I am not a sun. I am only a human. I just get very lonely at times. And that is what bothers me.

SC: I have travelled a lot seeing things, learned a lot. I think you should watch yourself bleed in front of a mirror. That will calm you down. I don’t believe in manipulating things as you do. There is a complete sync that you fail to notice. You try to be more important than things which you preach and hence fail to appreciate the miracle. Let it be… let be…. Watch yourself bleed.